This *private* website has secrets hidden behind a login 'wall'. I'm not willing to show the public anything on the other side of this 'wall' that I sell, make, have an idea about, or oxford comma. If you know me personally then you understand my warpd[sic] sense of humor. In order to order something from me I need to know who you are. Please fill out the form below to gain login credentials allowing you access to the private parts of this website. I should be able to accommodate your request within an hour. Unless I'm away from my phone. Then it might be days. I vet all login requests. Filling out the bottom part might help with that *WINK*